Exhibit A

I hate what a challenge it is to stay consistent with blogging. I hate that it's been almost 2 months since my last post. Since doing the Artist Way I've been writing 3 pages of freehand almost everyday for several months which has somewhat replaced blogging a little. I just finished my third notebook and haven't had a chance to get a new one yet so it's been almost a week since I wrote and I can feel my brain and my heart filling up with no where to spill over. The daily writing has become such a significant part of my day. So that's why I'm here.

I don't even have anything to say really other than I felt the urgent need to be heard, even if by a blank page. I can't stay still, I can't focus. Maybe it's the very little caffeine I had today....maybe it's because I didn't get a good workout in, maybe it's because I'm restless. Restelss because I'm ready to start seeing results...in my body, in my creativity, in my role as a stay at home mom. To clarify, the progress is there and always has been but it's so gradual that it's easy to become impatient. Maybe I'll only feel that today or maybe the rest of the week. It's a constant ebb and flow. Shocker.

I want to be done now because I can't think of anything else to say, but the tugging is still there, that there's a need for something to get out. Possibly the fear that we are quickly approaching the time we will begin discussing baby #2 and I feel very unprepared...or that my best friend is NOT in fact moving back to Nashville and it's completely unfair, or that 4 of my friends have new babies and I'm worried I'll be forgotten...or that I'm turning 30 this summer...or maybe (and most likely) this is just what happens when I don't get it all out on the page daily. No mother should be left alone with her thoughts for more than a couple days. There are a multitude of consequences and this post is Exibit A.

You're welcome.

P.S. Here's a video of an Instagram series I started called #momdiary. Enjoy. If it's works that is, I feel like it's not gonna work. Oh well..